STFU

So, Mom wanted to go to Vivace tonight, and I was more than happy to tag along. I've always liked the place - good food, nice ambiance.

Well, the ambiance was a bit spoiled tonight.

You see, there was one other table that was occupied on the floor we were on, and one jerk at that other table. He was, it seems, an expert on everything. He spoke about the evils of universal health care, wastefulness in the computer industry, cars, lightbulbs, and the housing market in California. And he never stopped talking. I am sure that the man is still filling the restaurant with hot air as I type this.

How do I know what he was talking about? He was that loud. Was he seated at the table next to ours? Nope. He was across the room from us.

Vivace is located in an old house that is full of nooks and doorways and other odd barriers, but that wasn't enough to dampen even one syllable from our table. He was so loud that, even at our table, it was more noise than Mom and I were comfortable matching. And he never stopped talking. Ever. The guy he was talking over managed maybe a word or two every now and then, but the conversation was really a monologue. Seriously. I don't think even a windbag the likes of Rush Limbaugh could have taken over a conversation with this guy. He was amazing.

Our server was ready to spill water on the guy's head. Mom and I were trying to figure out if there was a sprinkler head over the table. I was tempted to yell at him to shut up, but he would never have realized it was aimed at him. He was that arrogant.

And neither my mother nor myself agreed with the guy at all, which didn't help matters. The server was in the same boat. The three of us had great fun mocking the guy.

And I'm sure the man is still holding the entire table hostage to his great wisdom.